Me, and how I work

What you might want to know about me as a counsellor

I’ve been a counsellor since 2010, and clients say they find me friendly, kind and easy to talk to. As a person and a counsellor, I’m more at the practical, flexible, informal, collaborative, ‘working with you’ end of things and I’m not averse to a light hearted moment now and then. What I won’t do is talk about myself, or blind you with psycho-babble, or suggest you try strategies with no evidence to support them.

I don’t see clients as being ‘mentally ill’, I think in terms of the whole person and their physical wellbeing, emotional wellbeing and psychological wellbeing. I see all those as being completely connected, and my focus as a counsellor is to help you to improve your emotional and psychological wellbeing, so you can be more resilient and better able to cope with life’s challenges. For me, each client is a unique person doing what they can to cope with thoughts and feelings, maybe to do with tough experiences or situations in their lives.

I work in a very flexible way because I want counselling to be as do-able and hassle-free as it can be. If you don’t want the traditional ‘every week, same day, same time’ way, I completely get that. My clients can fit their sessions around work, shifts, appointments or child care. My diary is online and sessions can be booked, rearranged or cancelled (at least 24 hours ahead) whenever suits you. You can book one at a time or plan ahead and book a few so you get the times that work best for you. You can book phone sessions (handy if you’re not sure where you’ll be, you only need a quiet and private space), or video sessions (if you’d prefer to ‘meet’ face to face, and you know you’ll have a suitable space), or you can mix and match.

 You can have sessions for as long as you’re finding them useful, for example anxiety and insomnia are usually much improved in 6 – 8 sessions. We’d stay aware of that by checking in regularly to see if you’re getting what you need from sessions – constructive feedback is absolutely welcome.

So mine is a flexible approach, but it’s not an ‘anything goes’ approach, I always work ethically and appropriately and in the most helpful and effective way I know. I have a counselling agreement which explains certain boundaries which are there for both our benefit: I don’t offer support between sessions.

I only work with individuals aged 18 and over. And as I work remotely, I don’t work with people who are at immediate risk of taking their life. If you feel you’re at risk of harming yourself, please do take action to help you stay safe. Call Samaritans on 116123, or call your local NHS mental health crisis team (google that phrase) or go to A&E, the place for any kind of health crisis, physical or psychological. See the crisis support page for more details.

I have supervision and continuing professional development (CPD); I keep abreast of new research and ideas which may help clients. I only offer evidence-based suggestions and strategies, for example working with anxiety, sleep or self care.

 

Am I who you’re looking for?

By now you’ll have got a sense of who I am and how I work, and that may or may not be what you’re looking for. And if you’re still not quite sure, we can have a session to talk through what life’s like for you and how you might want it to be different. I’ll get a good idea of how therapy will help, and we can get a sense of how we’d work together. If for some reason I think you’d be better suited to a different kind of counselling, or if I think another counsellor is better suited to offer it, I’ll say so, and I may be able to signpost you.

At that point, there’s no pressure at all to make a decision. If you think you could work with me as your counsellor, we’d come to an agreement about our work together. I might ask a few questions about your preferences, like ‘how do you want to feel when our work is complete?’ how do you want your sessions to feel (and how not), how do you feel about some gentle challenge, would you like to make notes, to have a few moments of silence now and then… and anything else that’s important to you.

There are some things I expect of you: to be honest about what you need and how you experience sessions; to make sure, or as sure as you can, that you’re in a private, safe and confidential space when we speak.

What now?

So if you recognise yourself in what you’ve read, you don’t have to cope alone, even if you’ve been trying to for a long time. You can book that first appointment, just to see what you think. What have you got to lose? If it’s not for you, then at least you’ll know, and even if the thought of it is awful, most people breathe a sigh of relief for just having made a start. They say it was easier than they thought, or at least, less awkward or scary than they feared. You can book a session online, or if you’d rather, you can call, text, email, or leave me a voicenote, whatever’s easiest. So when you decide something needs to change, feel free to take that first step.

In the meantime, take good care of yourself, bye for now,

Caroline